Five o'clock

In the last few years of my mother's life, I know that she struggled because she didn't feel useful.  Her health prevented her from being up and about much and thus she was very limited in the ways that she could serve others.  That was a real challenge since service was as natural as breathing for her.  Phone calls and notes were her primary source of reaching out and giving but I am not sure she knew the impact of those little things which she was able to do.

I found that by five o-clock in the afternoon I was often at the end of my rope after caring for little needy people all day and not having much adult interaction, and I think that is when I called my mom the most.  I would start to make dinner and realize I was starved for some adult interaction, or I would just need an emotional boost to keep me going through the day, so I would call my mother.  She would share bits of family news, listen to what was going on in our world halfway across the country, and if I was struggling she would always buoy me up.  Sometimes she would have a suggestion, but often I heard comments like "this too will pass", or "I know you can do it" and it never felt trite coming from her.  I knew she meant it and she believed in me - and in Heavenly Father's ability to help me - and I always felt better.  It's been almost two years since my earthly mother has become my angel mother, and I still feel her influence and aid blessing my life, but I find that I miss her most at five o'clock in the afternoon.  I'm not sure she or I knew at the time how much those phone calls meant to me, but now I can look and see that small things make a big difference, and there is always something that each one of us can give.

 

Hannah with her Grandma - June 2001

In over my head

Life as the mother of six children means that feeling as if I am in over my head is a state of being.  It never goes away.  I was thinking about that this morning, and how it is very different from being overwhelmed (I have times like that, too).  Being overwhelmed carries a state of panic or helplessness.  Recognizing that I am in over my head compels me to be more humble.  It creates more earnestness as I search for answers in the scriptures.  I plead sincerely in my prayers for the help that I need to make it through the responsibilities of every day - meeting the needs of seven family members is next to impossible.  While it is taxing and at times a bit disheartening, I can feel myself stretching and growing and I have come to appreciate the feeling of gaining abilities for which I wasn't actively seeking.  It is ennobling and speaks to the light of Christ which is in me.  I am so very grateful that daily - hourly - I can reach out to my Heavenly Father and he answers my pleas and blesses me with much more strength than I could ever have on my own.  What a marvelous, refining experience parenting is when we partner-parent with the Lord.  "For with God, nothing shall be impossible."  Luke 1:37

Mother's Day 2012

Time to go bury a dead rabbit.  This is a first for me.  

Backyard Play

When couches are getting jumped on, and kitchen stools & surfaces are being climbed, I declare outside playtime. 

Today's outdoor play was confined to the backyard.  It involved fresh eggs from our chicken coop, making nests out of grass, lots of kite string, and mittened hands even though it's near eighty degrees.  Creative play at its finest. 

I'm thinking we've read a bit too much of Horton Hatches an Egg, as my boys requested that I take the following pictures.  Of course, they tried SITTING on the eggs, but that fared in cracked eggs.  Now equipped with plastic Easter eggs there are enough to go around so all three boys can have nests and sit on them to boot. 

Video games are so over-rated.